Community Corner

Moms Talk: The Myth Of The Perfect Mother

Why do people expect moms to be perfect and whom do you turn to when you're overwhelmed?

Each week the Mentor Patch Moms Council answers a question on parenthood posed to them by readers or another member of council.

This week's question:

So I was reading this and it made me wonder.

Why do we expect from so much from moms? Where did this myth of the perfect mom come from and why do we hold everyone to that standard? And why do we heap mommy guilt onto good moms who just might have a bad day?

So, my question to you is, how often do you feel overwhelmed? And do you feel as if there is anyone who you can discuss this feeling with honestly?

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Donna Milnes:

I think most moms feel overwhelmed and guilty at not being that “perfect mom.”

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I think moms in general are way to hard on themselves about not having a cooked meal at home, not having the spotlessly clean house, not having the perfectly behaved children, not looking like they just stepped out of a fashion magazine, etc.

Talking to other moms and friends definitely will tell you that you are not alone in these feelings.

My best friends and I could have a good laugh or a good cry when we would get together and share our successes and failures of being that “perfect mom!” 

Mary Jo Stack:

My guess is that most of us feel overwhelmed quite often. I think most of us are more like "Roseanne" than we are like "June Cleaver."

I have found that my generation is much more open sharing our concerns. I have plenty of friends with whom do discuss my feelings and I am thankful for them all.

Renee Ochaya:

I feel overwhelmed more than I would like.

Fortunately I have several great mom friends who are amazing people and amazing moms. They too are just as imperfect as I am, and our long chats over lunch, at the pool or at a sporting event keep me sane and help me to realize that we all have similar issues and concerns with our kids and parenting and most importantly that perfect isn’t the goal.

None of us are perfect; but, in my opinion, we are all perfect moms, doing the best we know how to love our kids and raise them to be responsible, caring adults.


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